{"id":1290,"date":"2011-11-19T23:28:44","date_gmt":"2011-11-19T22:28:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/?p=1290"},"modified":"2011-11-19T23:28:44","modified_gmt":"2011-11-19T22:28:44","slug":"aldatma-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/?p=1290","title":{"rendered":"Aldatma"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>T\u00fcrk boylar\u0131n\u0131n M\u00d6 Ana erkil ya\u015fad\u0131klar\u0131 bilinen bir ger\u00e7ek art\u0131k.<img loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-1291\" style=\"border: 3px solid black; margin: 3px;\" title=\"cok-eslilik\" src=\"http:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/cok-eslilik.jpg\" alt=\"cok-eslilik\" width=\"269\" height=\"210\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/cok-eslilik.jpg 480w, https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/cok-eslilik-300x234.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 269px) 100vw, 269px\" \/><\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">G\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fczdeyse toplumun de\u011fer yarg\u0131lar\u0131 erke\u011fin \u00e7oke\u015fli yap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 de\u011fil de kad\u0131n\u0131nkini destekleseydi\u2026<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">\u201cGenel\u201de g\u00f6re kavram\u0131 olu\u015fturan yap\u0131 ta\u015flar\u0131; kad\u0131n, erkek ve seks.   Aldatma deyince insanlar\u0131n akl\u0131na nedense sadece kad\u0131n ya da erke\u011fin   e\u015flerine sadakatsiz davranmas\u0131 geliyor. Halbuki aldatman\u0131n as\u0131l kelime   anlam\u0131; de\u011fi\u015fik bir tutumla, kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndakini yan\u0131ltmak, yanl\u0131\u015f bilgi   vermek, oyalamakt\u0131r.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sak\u0131n k\u0131zmay\u0131n olay\u0131 bu a\u00e7\u0131dan de\u011ferlendirmeyece\u011fim. Ben de aldatma   kavram\u0131n\u0131 kad\u0131n, erkek ve seks \u00fczerinden i\u015fleyece\u011fim. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc di\u011fer   aldatmalar pek can ac\u0131tm\u0131yor olmal\u0131 ki tart\u0131\u015f\u0131lmaya de\u011fer g\u00f6r\u00fclm\u00fcyor.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Her sevi\u015fmenin i\u00e7inde a\u015fk yok. Di\u011fer canl\u0131lar gibi insanlar da   \u00e7o\u011falmak arzusuyla kar\u015f\u0131 cinse y\u00f6nelir. Bu nedenle seksin ba\u015flang\u0131\u00e7   noktas\u0131 yani seks yapmay\u0131 isteme k\u0131sm\u0131 gayet basit ve anla\u015f\u0131l\u0131r. Ne   zaman ki kar\u015f\u0131m\u0131za a\u015f\u0131k oldu\u011fumuz, birlikte ya\u015famak istedi\u011fimiz biri   \u00e7\u0131k\u0131yor, sevi\u015fmek bizim i\u00e7in i\u00e7g\u00fcd\u00fcsel olan bir eylem olmaktan \u00e7\u0131k\u0131yor.   As\u0131l k\u0131yamet de sonras\u0131nda kopuyor zaten.<\/p>\n<p>Bir kad\u0131nla erkek beraber ya\u015famak, payla\u015fmak, \u00fcretmek i\u00e7in kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131kl\u0131   anla\u015farak bir araya geldiklerinde sevi\u015fme istemine de bir k\u0131s\u0131tlama   geliyor. Genellikle bu her iki taraf\u0131nda talebi do\u011frultusunda   ger\u00e7ekle\u015fiyor. Tabii toplumsal \u00f6rf ve al\u0131\u015fkanl\u0131klar\u0131 \u00a0da g\u00f6z ard\u0131   etmememiz laz\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>E\u011fer beraber ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131n bir e\u015fin varsa ba\u015fka biriyle birlikte olmak   yok. Ama bu k\u0131s\u0131tlamaya \u00e7o\u011funlukla sadece kad\u0131n\u0131n uymas\u0131 beklendi,   bekleniyor. Erkekler, bilimi de arkalar\u0131na alarak bu k\u0131s\u0131tlamaya fazla   itaat etmiyorlar.<\/p>\n<p>Yap\u0131lan ara\u015ft\u0131rmalar g\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fczde kad\u0131n\u0131n da (erkekler kadar olmasa da)   art\u0131k bu k\u0131s\u0131tlamaya uymad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 do\u011fruluyor. Hatta Amerika\u2019da evli olan   baz\u0131 \u00e7iftlerin birer sevgilileri oldu\u011fu ve herkesin birbirinden  haberdar  oldu\u011fu bile s\u00f6yleniyor.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Bence a\u015f\u0131k olarak bir araya gelmi\u015f bir \u00e7iftin o yo\u011fun a\u015fk duygusu  ge\u00e7ene kadar birbirlerine sadakatsiz davranmalar\u0131 pek m\u00fcmk\u00fcn de\u011fil.<img loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-1292\" style=\"border: 3px solid black; margin: 3px;\" title=\"evlilik\" src=\"http:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/evlilik1.jpg\" alt=\"evlilik\" width=\"245\" height=\"214\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/evlilik1.jpg 350w, https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/evlilik1-300x261.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 245px) 100vw, 245px\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sorunlar kar\u015f\u0131 tarafa duyulan a\u015fk\u0131n, heyecan\u0131n ba\u015fka duygulara   d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fmesiyle ba\u015fl\u0131yor. Sevi\u015fme iste\u011finde b\u00f6l\u00fcnme meydana geliyor, e\u015finle   sevi\u015fmek tatmin edici olmuyor ve d\u0131\u015far\u0131ya davetiyeler haz\u0131rlanmaya   ba\u015flan\u0131yor. Bunu erkek \u00e7ok daha rahat ve korkusuzca yap\u0131yor.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sevdi\u011fi kad\u0131nla ya\u015famaya devam edip a\u015f\u0131k olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 hatta bazen   tan\u0131mad\u0131\u011f\u0131 sadece fiziksel olarak arzulad\u0131\u011f\u0131 ba\u015fka kad\u0131nlarla birlikte   oluyor.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Peki ne oluyor, kad\u0131n aldat\u0131lm\u0131\u015f oluyor. Toplumsal de\u011fer yarg\u0131lar\u0131   erke\u011fin \u00e7ok e\u015fli yap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 de\u011fil de kad\u0131n\u0131nkini destekleseydi, ekonomik   olarak kad\u0131n erkekten daha iyi konumda olsayd\u0131 acaba kad\u0131nlar\u0131n ihanet   say\u0131lar\u0131 erkeklerinkini ge\u00e7mez miydi?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sorun b\u00fcy\u00fck, \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcm basit; kad\u0131n da erkek de \u201caldatabiliyor\u201d.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Bilimsel ara\u015ft\u0131rmalarla da tespit edilmi\u015f, nedenleri farkl\u0131l\u0131k   g\u00f6sterse de sonu\u00e7 bu. Herkes bu ger\u00e7e\u011fi bilerek \u00f6m\u00fcr boyu sadakat   anla\u015fmas\u0131 imzal\u0131yor. \u00d6m\u00fcr boyu sadakat talebi olmayan \u00e7iftler de bu   anla\u015fmaya imza at\u0131yor.<\/p>\n<p>Yanl\u0131\u015f olan da bu zaten; her \u00e7ift kendi karakterleri, talepleri   do\u011frultusunda kendilerine \u00f6zel evlilik s\u00f6zle\u015fmesi haz\u0131rlasalar, topluma   ve sevdiklerine tutamayacaklar\u0131 s\u00f6zleri vermeseler ortada ne su\u00e7lu, ne   ma\u011fdur, ne aldatan ne de aldat\u0131lan olacak.<\/p>\n<p>Ben insan\u0131n di\u011fer canl\u0131lardan farkl\u0131 olarak i\u00e7g\u00fcd\u00fclerini kontrol   edebilip tek-e\u015fli ya\u015fayabilece\u011fine inan\u0131yorum. Bunu ba\u015farabilen \u00e7iftler   var. Her iki taraf\u0131n da bunu istemesi, bunun i\u00e7in \u00e7aba sarf etmesi gerek  tabii ki. Benim anlatmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m \u015fey ise \u00f6zetle \u015fudur ki;<\/p>\n<p>beraber ya\u015fayan kad\u0131n ve erkekler birbirlerini \u00e7ok iyi tan\u0131d\u0131klar\u0131,   neyi yap\u0131p neyi yapamayacaklar\u0131n\u0131 bildikleri halde aldatmaktan   bahsediyorlar. Herkes her \u015feyi biliyor.<\/p>\n<p>\u00dc\u00e7 bin y\u0131ld\u0131r var olan tek-e\u015fli evlilik s\u00f6zle\u015fmesine iki taraf da ihanet ediyor.<\/p>\n<p>Bana as\u0131l aldat\u0131lan evlilik kurumu gibi geliyor.<img loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-1293\" style=\"border: 3px solid black; margin: 3px;\" title=\"Vesikalik_02\" src=\"http:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/Vesikalik_02.jpg\" alt=\"Vesikalik_02\" width=\"102\" height=\"130\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/Vesikalik_02.jpg 472w, https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/Vesikalik_02-235x300.jpg 235w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 102px) 100vw, 102px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>M.Tevfik \u00d6zkartal<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>T\u00fcrk boylar\u0131n\u0131n M\u00d6 Ana erkil ya\u015fad\u0131klar\u0131 bilinen bir ger\u00e7ek art\u0131k.<br \/>\nG\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fczdeyse toplumun de\u011fer yarg\u0131lar\u0131 erke\u011fin \u00e7oke\u015fli yap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 de\u011fil de kad\u0131n\u0131nkini destekleseydi\u2026<br \/>\n\u201cGenel\u201de g\u00f6re kavram\u0131 olu\u015fturan yap\u0131 ta\u015flar\u0131; kad\u0131n, erkek ve seks.   Aldatma deyince insanlar\u0131n akl\u0131na nedense sadece kad\u0131n ya da erke\u011fin   e\u015flerine sadakatsiz davranmas\u0131 geliyor. Halbuki aldatman\u0131n as\u0131l kelime   anlam\u0131; de\u011fi\u015fik [&#8230;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1290"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1290"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1290\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1295,"href":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1290\/revisions\/1295"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1290"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1290"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gazetealmanci.de\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1290"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}